3,000 Point Battle Report: FIVE Primarchs vs Imperial Guard!


It’s been a while, so lets have a battle report!

Me and George (the Space Wolf player I’ve clashed with a number of times) decided to dust off the models and have a good old fashioned scrap. He asked if I minded that he brought his 30k army, I said no, he asked if I mind bringing a Primarch, I said no. I said it would be funny if he brought three Primarchs, he said he can if I want, I said why not?

Cue a few days later and I get out my 3,000 point Imperial Guard army. It looks like this:

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George unpacks his 3,000 point army. It looks like this:

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Sixteen models. FIVE Primarchs. Two other named characters (Abaddon and Garviel Loken).

I was looking forward to this. It was either going to go very, very well, or very, very badly…

PRIMARCH PARTY BUS

Horus Lupercal, Warlord (because why would you not?)

Angron

Fulgrim

Lorgar

Mortarion

Abaddon with 5 Justaerin (one had a multi melta)

Garviel Loken with command squad.

If only all lists were so easy to type out! With each Primarch rocking at least T6 W5 (AT LEAST, looking at you Mortarion), all but one having a 2+, most having a 4+-or-better, plus all the normal great gubbins you get by being a Primarch, this was a scary, scary list.

IMPERIAL GUARD

Command Squad with Kurov’s Aquila (Warlord), Chimera

Command Squad, Chimera

Pask in a Punisher (and a Demolisher mate)

Two identical platoons, each with a Platoon command squad and three infantry squads. Each squad has vox and plasma.

Melta vets with Demolitions doctrine (melta out the wazoo!) in Chimera.

Two basilisks

Stormlord

Shadowsword

Ordo Malleus Inquisitor, 3 Servo Skulls, Termy armour, force sword, Brain Mines

Ordo Xenos Inquisitor, 3 Servo Skulls

Inquisitorial henchmen squad with two crusaders, four death cult assassins, and a priest.

So, a fair old bit of armour with plenty of warm bodies to park on objectives. Basically, the plan is to sit waaay the hell back and not let anyone get close. Let’s see how far that gets us…

Deployment:

I won the roll by elected to go second, purely because I didn’t want Horus to steal the initiative on a 4+ like the clever sausage he is. We rolled tactical escalation, and setting up on long table edges (bad for me!).

George took literally seconds to set up, with a nice spacing of Primarchs facing my side. Horus and Abaddon were in reserves, ready to Deep Strike in. I spent considerably longer setting up, with my Tanks spread out and chumpy infantry filling up all the space on my side of the field. No deepstriking rear armour melta if I can help it!

I popped my warlord in the Stormlord (delicious enormous bubble of Preferred Enemy granted by Kurov’s Aquila), as well as the Inquisition unit and a random unit of guardsmen.

Each Primarch was directly opposite something that could hopefully put a dent in them: Mortarion faced the Shadowsword, Angron faced the Stormlord, Lorgar faced Pask and Fulgrim had the Basilisks to deal with.

I didn’t seize, so George went first. Gulp.

Before we begin, try and guess what will happen. Revisit this guess at the end to see how close you were to the mark.

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SoH TURN ONE

In what was probably one of the shortest turns of 40k ever, George moved everyone up. Lorgar cast a nasty curse on my Stormlord that gave it Get’s Hot!, Particularly nasty when the beast can put out well over forty shots a round. Ouch. Other than that, he was done.

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IG TURN ONE

My my turn was slightly longer. Basically, I knew that once those Primarchs got close, I was a goner.

I moved practically nobody, and went straight to shooting.

The first thing I did was a rapid fire Plasma at Loken, rolled two Gets Hot! and my first plasma man died. Never mind.

My Shadowsword managed to hit Mortarion squarely on the face, but only inflicted one wound, which was saved. Boo! He withered all the fire I could chuck at him from that side of the field. Curse that 2+ T7 W7 profile!

Angron was not so lucky. A swathe of Multi-Laser fire, combined with 30 S6 AP3 shots from the Vulkan Mega-Bolter on the Stormlord brought him way down in wounds, and a few lucky sponson lascannons took him out entirely. One primarch down, four to go!

I poured everything else I had into Lorgar. Pask, two basilisks, a Demolisher and some plucky guardsmen did what they could, and some awful saves from George caused him to fall as well. Two down!

Whole walls of Lasgun tried their best to take down anyone and everyone, but they didn’t do a single wound. To be honest, what did we expect to happen?

SoH TURN TWO

George was understandably a bit gutted at this point, having lost over 700 points in one phase. He didn’t let that stop him though…

Horus popped up mere inches from the Shadowsword, staring it down. Uh oh.

Fulgrim and Mortarion raced down the table, ready to strike…

But both failed their charges! There was still hope!

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IG TURN TWO

I knew I was going to have to lay some serious hurt on now. As soon as the Primarchs get into assault I was boned.

Horus and his mates had nicely lined up in a tight circle, so my Shadowsword aimed his Volcano cannon on them…

Several Terminators went down, including Abaddon (who unfortunately took 6+d6 wounds by himself. Ouch!), but Horus shrugged the damage off. Over 100 shots, from Lasgun to Multilaser to Plasma each flew at the Warmaster, but he remained standing on one wound. One wound! Curses!

Pask and his friends brought Fulgrim down to 3 wounds, but he still lived…

Mortarion barely felt anything from anyone, even my Stormlord barely hurt him. I think he maybe took one wound. Uh oh. I knew I needed to take the fight to him. My inquisitor and his posse disembarked from the Stormlord and charged him!

…only to roll a 2 and a 1 for their charge range. Fail.

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SoH TURN THREE

This time, it was impossible for the Primarchs to fail their charges. Horus, in a lust for glory, charged the Shadowsword. Loken charged a Chimera, and a remaining Terminator charged another Chimera containing my Melta vets. Fulgrim took on some Guardsmen that were blocking Pask, and Mortarion attacked the Stormlord.

Hull points were dished out all around, with the Shadowsword being brought down to 6 Hull Points. Nice try Horus, but no cigar! The Stormlord fared similarly. Ever other combat involed vehicles either becoming immobilised or wrecks, and any combat with normal guard ended in a single round of Space Marine butchery. Brutal!

Oh, and George IWND’d Mortarion and Fulgrim back to fighting fit. Uh oh.

IG TURN THREE

Mayhem! Guard being cut down like dry wheat! Tanks getting damaged! Primarchs in the ranks!

My tanks repositioned themselves to reduce the risk of friendly fire, and the infantry formed ranks…

In a dazzling display of ineptitude, my Shadowsword – that’s the specialist anti-titan tank, specially created over decades of Martian labour – managed to fire at Horus and scatter back onto myself. George perked up and rolled on the table… And rolled a 6! D6+6 wounds inflicted to myself! My Shadowsword blew up spectacularly, even rolling the highest result on the Catastrophic Damage chart, but Horus was unharmed.

Well, until literally half my remaining army focussed fire on him. When he survived, random Guardsmen who hadn’t fired charged him, each channeling the spirit of Ollanius Pious! We took the Warhamster down in a fusillade of steel and laser to light up the sky!

A unit of plucky guardsmen fixed bayonettes in the chaos and charged the Terminator, who fell as well! A good day to be a Guardsman!

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The Inquisitor’s unit took the fight to the enemy as well, charging the Primarch of the Death Guard! The only people that could hurt Morty were the Death Cult Assassins, who, with rerolls to hit and wound from the Priest, were able to inflict a single wound. Six more to go! In response, Mortarian wiped out half the squad, including the Priest and the Crusaders, as well as half the DCA. Oof.

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REST OF THE MATCH

I’ll sum up the various scraps here as the game went on until the end of Turn seven.

Garviel Loken survived until the end, single handedly wiping out around 3 squads of Guardsmen, including my melta vets. He’s a beast.

Fulgrim didn’t die either, and in fact inflicted a vast amount of damage. He killed Pask, the Demolisher, and every single Guardsman on that side of the table. By the end of it he was back to full wounds as well because of It Will Not Die. Scary.

Mortarion did eventually meet his end, but mostly for fluff reasons. He easily finished off the Inquisitors, then constantly hunted the Stormlord. The Stormlord could barely scratch the Primarch, and eventually tried to run him over. Mortarion Death or Glory’d, failed, and got squished. Splat!

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All in all, the Imperial Guard won purely because they were able to spread out and hold most of the objectives. It was much closer than I thought it was going to be though.

It’s worth mentioning, even if not mentioned there was a huge amount of fire flying around, just most of it did nothing. Earthshaker rounds, heavy bolters, lasguns, every turn I was unleashing a full Imperial Guard firing line, but those Primarchs can’t half stand up to punishment.

All in all, a great game. I recommend giving it a go, it’s certainly unique!

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